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dickleer: (and then you looked me right in the eyes) (Default)
Default
Keywords:
  • and then you looked me right in the eyes
Comment: and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
dickleer: (I saw it and almost just was like "Ice)
Keywords:
  • I saw it and almost just was like "Ice
Comment: breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
dickleer: (how many ponies have to be on my pajama)
Keywords:
  • how many ponies have to be on my pajama
Comment: pants to convince him im gay?
dickleer: (Booty calls should never involve the)
Keywords:
  • Booty calls should never involve the
Comment: cops
dickleer: (I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.)
Keywords:
  • I had sex on a dinosaur comforter,
  • tell me that does not define my life.
dickleer: (There is nothing wrong with me)
Keywords:
  • There is nothing wrong with me
Comment: introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
dickleer: (Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles)
Keywords:
  • Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles
Comment: at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
dickleer: (we broke the bed curtan rods a dresser)
Keywords:
  • we broke the bed curtan rods a dresser
Comment: drawer and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
dickleer: (i'm face down in a ditch right now)
Keywords:
  • i'm face down in a ditch right now
Comment: please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
dickleer: (When our dicks touched he made a)
Keywords:
  • When our dicks touched he made a
Comment: lightsaber noise.
dickleer: (Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's)
Keywords:
  • Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's
Comment: just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
dickleer: (I feel strange, like something is off with my body)
Keywords:
  • I feel strange,
  • like something is off with my body
Comment: Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
dickleer: (Well its official I'm into significantly)
Keywords:
  • Well its official I'm into significantly
Comment: freakier sex than even I thought possible.
dickleer: (Some advice...don't play drunk rock em)
Keywords:
  • Some advice...don't play drunk rock em
Comment: sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
dickleer: (turns out putting a tie on my unicorn)
Keywords:
  • turns out putting a tie on my unicorn
Comment: onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder